Recently I was hanging out at my favorite Dallas area Starbucks for my morning coffee when one of the other regular customers who I gotten to know proudly showed me her newly straightened hair. She had gone from tight bouncy coils to stick straight strands. The change in her hair was truly dramatic.
(Image Courtesy of KMS -Couch In The Grass - All Rights Reserved - KMS)
After complimenting her on the newly chemically straightened hairstyle my inner noisy hair spy proceeded to politely ask her lots of questions about her natural texture.
In her late 30s she told me she had gotten divorced about two years ago and had recently re-entered the dating scene.
She told me her ex-husband had really liked her hair straighter better than naturally curly. She confessed she had been fighting her curls, ringlets and kinks for years and just wanted some straight hair for a change.
This lovely woman had gone to a Dallas salon for a professional chemical straightening with the Rusk system. I told her I had taken classes in the Rusk straightening and while I was a big believer that everyone should love their natural hair texture, if straightening is the goal, Rusk certainly has a great chemically based product line of relaxers and straighteners to offer.
I also asked her if she would tell her new dating companions that her hair was naturally curly. She thought for a moment and said she definitely would share about her natural curls but she personally feels better about herself and her hair when its straight versus curly. She also confessed she sometimes feels guilty for wanting to stop fighting her curls because she knows there is an International Love Your Curls movement but she loves her hair straight.
Feeling empathy for her hair situation I told her that I personally feel better very blonde even though my own hair is a much darker shade. Ahhh, she laughed, I feel better about my chemical straightening addiction.
Do I believe that everyone with natural curls should always honor their curls and never alter them? On the flip side do I think natural curls should always be chemically altered? No to both. I honestly believe we should honor what makes us feel best about ourselves, regardless of the media hype or any other reasons. If you love your natural curls, flaunt them. If not, wear your hair as you desire to wear it.As we were both leaving Starbucks I told her she should always follow her heart regarding her hair and if she truly loved her natural curls straightened, she was honoring her true wishes. Afterall, regardless of our hair length, type, texture, color or style, there is no right or wrong way to wear your hair. The only wrong way is if you don't love it.
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