JerkyFlea: March 2000

JerkyFlea: March 2000

Author: JerkyFlea

Date: March 2000

Fleamail

Before we get to a few of the longer emails, let's start in the obvious place with reaction to COURTNEY THORNE-SMITH's new style...

I think Courtney Thorne-Smith's new butcher "butch" job is without a doubt the ugliest, crappiest look so far in 2000 -- what was she thinking??? All she needs now is several piercings and some big tattoos of Harleys!!! ---- HBCHTEX

I've never liked Courtney Thorne-Smith, (she always looks so bitchy!) and that short hairdo that she now has does nothing to help her. It is much, much to short for my liking and I find that it makes her look even more annoyed than she usually does.---- Monica

I am overwhelmed by the need to tell you that Courtney Thorne-Smith looks like a gym teacher. That's not a compliment in case there was any ambiguity in that statement. ---- Kathleen C.

I could devote this entire letter to how sad I am over this one.  Courteney, you hit the mark beautifully with your shoulder-length shag, it softened the angles of your face perfectly.  And because it looked great, we all knew it wouldn't last.  This looks like you cut it with a Flowbee (yes, another flowbie refererence, but if the cheesy informercial gadget fits.....), and then let it dry by placing a fan directly behind your head, at a slight angle.  Let's hope this one grows out quick. ---- Andy S.

Geez, I wish you guys wouldn't be so obtuse with your comments. I hate spending all my time trying to figure out what you mean. =)

vvv

Next, a brief comment on someone I've only mentioned in passing in the column, CHRISTINA AGUILERA:

I really, really dislike Christina Aguilera's hair. It is much too pale, flat and greasy looking. Her haircut is similar to that super-straight style worn by Heather Locklear, which I don't like either. Aguilera's hair also has the nasty habit of sticking to her lip gloss when she sings and that's simply gross ---- Monica

Her hair reminds me of those white puffs that they sell with those body washes you use in the shower.  If, of course, the puff was straighter.  I guess if you crossed the puff with a troll doll and smoothed it down...

vvv

It's always cool when someone decides to do my work for me and do a complete report on a celebrity on their own. Such would be the case of the next letter regarding JOSIE DAVIS:

As I was reading about the different people who email you about this and that I thought I would take a turn at it.   Recently, I have tuned into 90210 a time or 2. Anyway, I noticed a gorgeous blonde with a short haircut on there. Only then did I realize that it was Josie Davis, formerly of Charles In Charge (I think). Well, I found a few photos in case you were interested.  

The first is from her years on Charles. Very bubblegum!!
   
The next pic is from her Young and the Restless  days:
   
And finally on 90210:

I don't know, maybe its nothing spectacular. But, she's been tempting me to cut my hair lately and I've been growing it out for 3 years!!   ---- Susan S.

Good work Susan! I must say that Josie's crop is quite flattering on her. By the way, is it just me or does she look almost exactly like a cross between Brittany Daniel and Josie Bissett?

vvv

And now we get into the emails that span a few subjects. First up are a few excerpts from a letter from Lily W. (with my comments in black italics):

LOVE your column!!!!  - Just a few things that I have to get off my chest about celebrity hair and who better to vent to?    

Possibly the CarTalk guys on NPR, but they probably wouldn't understand...  

O.K.: The extensions thing, you (and Andy, is it?) covered that very well, expressing how I've been feeling..... aaarrrggghh seeing these things EVERYWHERE is bugging me, and the most bothersome is the otherwise lovely and pretty-enough-to-wear-her-hair-any-way NANCY O'DELL  of Access Hollywood.  She had a blunt cut shoulder length do  one day (which I was really admiring) and then the next day....   BOOM!   long hair. Not only that...Long Wiiissspppy thin hair which is ALWAYS just on the one side.  and it's been this way for like, MONTHS now. Exactly same, fake thin hair streaking down her right side.  It  even appeared to me that It was such a small piece that she has to hold perfectly still so as not to "lose" it... from that one side...  (which is easy considering her job calls for pretty much sitting still in front of a camera)  I think I'm right on this, cause I saw her on "The List" and when she started moving around too much it looked kinda ...funny.   She also looked  like she didn't want to move too much .  Nancy! It's O.K. honey!!!! take that thing off and move around! Be Free!      (Sorry but this has been bugging me for some time, and I anxiously await for the return of Nancy O'Dell's real hair.)  

Yeah, but how do you REALLY feel about Nancy?  If you search back through the old columns (I think it's late spring/early summer of last year), you'll find a report on Nancy from when she went to the bob.  I pretty much agree with you.

HELLO KATHIE LEE GIFFORD!!   Who does her hair for the "Live w/ Regis and  Kathie Lee"  show?    Now, it's getting late and I don't wanna get off on a rant here, but, pick a style and go with it!  When it's simple and straight, it looks,...well, it's passible... BUT WHEN it's curled it's like HELLO 80's!!!!!!   Actually, I think the reason it's only "passible" when it's straight is due to all the INTENSE styling /spraying /rollers/ heat/ ratting/ god only knows what else they do to the poor girls hair ---that it endures when they "curl" it.  ( I realize she has a broadway show, and that can't be easy on her- or her hair)......But someone, SOMEONE  behind that set is doing this.

I've almost said something about Kathie Lee in a couple of columns, but I couldn't come up with a legitimate way to say, "Is it just me, or is she getting more frightening looking everyday?"

Courtney Thorne-Smith picture courtesy E!, Christina Aguilera picture courtesy The Business Wire, Nancy O'Dell picture courtesy Hollywood.com, Kathie Lee Gifford picture courtesy The Rosie O'Donnell Show

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