JerkyFlea: March 2000

JerkyFlea: March 2000
Author: JerkyFlea

Date: March 2000

The Latest (cont')

If you want a good example of why extensions are getting on my nerves, I would offer up HUNTER TYLO.  Hunter, best known for "The Bold & The Beautiful" (as opposed, I guess to the short lived spin-off "The Timid & The Repulsive") and having long hair, has recently cut locks up to her shoulders in a long layered shag style.  However, unless you happened to stumble across this tidbit of info in one of the soap opera magazines or I told you, you'd have absolutely no idea.  Why?  Because Hunter is wearing extensions that almost exactly mimic her style prior to the cut.  Only by close examination can you detect the break in the length and shorter layers, indicating that it has indeed been cut.  

Before

After

And the "After" hidden behind extensions

Oh, and thanks to Dan P. for the scans of the "afters" and video captures.

FLEA'S CALL:  First, let me say that Hunter's new cut is very attractive on her, and even though I preferred her hair long, this is one of the more flattering shorter styles she could have chosen.  And, at least in the beginning, Hunter felt the same way.  When discussing the new cut with Soap Opera Digest, she said that she "thinks the new style, which was cut in stages, is a little easier to handle and is more trendy."  When asked if she would go shorter, a la co-star Katherine Kelly Lang, she said that she "does not think that her long face lends itself to that kind of style, so she still needs some length."

So, if Hunter seemed to have hit the exact length she was after, what's with the extensions?  My guess is that either she later decided she didn't like the cut or they needed time to integrate it into the plot on "B&B".  Whatever the reason is, it's frankly just maddening to know that she instantly decided to hide the new cut behind extensions.  Just seems pointless.  Or as the aforementioned Dan P. put it in the email accompanying the pictures: "Let's try to get this straight.  She pays good money to get perfectly lovely hair cut off, then she pays more money to have it put back on again?  This makes sense ONLY to a woman."  And, before you ask, no, you can't have Dan's email address. 

  vvv

You know, up until just a few days ago, I thought that Lauren Holly and Hunter Tylo would be my big news items for this month.  That was before CELINE DION appeared on a French talk show missing most of her hair.  Though Celine had almost certainly been wearing extensions to thicken up her rather thin hair as it got long, she had been letting it grow ever since she cut it short about six years ago.  This wasn't, however, simply extension removal; this was a full blown tonsorial amputation.  So, what was behind Celine's adoption of her new Sarah MacLachlin-esque 'do?  According to helpful reader Kevin S., who saw the interview, she said that the decision to cut her hair is part of her year-long semi-retirement/vacation (which mean, I guess, that her hair is currently sunning itself on a beach in Bimini).  She also said that she is very pleased she did it and loves the ease with which she can care for it now, especially after swimming.  Her father, er, husband also likes it enormously, but was sorry to see her long locks depart.  

Before After

And also thanks to Spike for the pictures of the newly cropped Celine.

FLEA'S CALL:   It's probably a good thing that Celine has gone into semi-retirement for a while, since otherwise this dramatic style change could result in a nasty uproar by her fans.  Something akin to the violence that would erupt if the Brie and Chardonnay ran out at a Barbara Streisand concert.  Too horrible to contemplate.  In any case, I don't necessarily think cutting her hair was bad, but this wasn't the best style choice.  Her ultra long hair was a bit overwhelming for her thin frame and, as I said in a previous column, when she wore it big and curly, I was afraid a strong wind could send her airborne.  Something closer to shoulder-length with bangs would have been more in proportion and would work better with her long face, a feature that is only emphasized by the pixie.  Hopefully, she'll realize that the Sarah look isn't for everyone - like all the other women who were brainwashed during Lilith Fair did - and start to growing it out soon.

Snippets

In the ever growing "stuff I don't understand" file, we have CALISTA FLOCKHART.  As you recall, I said that her newly wavy locks looked great and added some much needed volume.  Now, she's had a few bangs cut as well.  If this addition came with the aforementioned waves, then things would be hunky-dory (kids, ask your parents).  However, the cutting the bangs seems to have deflated the rest of her hair, returning it to its previous flat, limp state.  Maybe they hit an air hose when they cut her bangs...  v  In a bizarre attempt to close the gap between the two ends of the Spice Girls attractive scale, VICTORIA BECKHAM, aka Posh Spice, has now adopted virtually the same cut and color as Melanie Chisholm, aka Sporty Spice.  While it looks better, aka sucks less, on Posh than Sporty, it doesn't look that great on either.  I guess since they fired their management, they don't have anyone to tell them when they make this sort of fashion faux paus, aka screw-up.

Couple of hair color changes to report.  First, as those of you who watched the Grammies saw, JENNIFER LOPEZ has finally ditched the blonde streaks she has worn for the past year in favor of dark brown and auburn.  You're probably saying to yourself, "You were looking at Jennifer's HAIR?!".  Well, not really, but it would periodically get in the way of her scarf, er, dress.  Anyway, I would guess the reason is that she needed something less rock star-ish for her role in the currently filming "The Wedding Planner".  Whatever the reason, I think the new color is a vast improvement.  v

  The other color change I heard about was DREW BARRYMORE abandoning her traditional blonde for red.  Didn't see her when she appeared on "Late Show: Backstage", but word is that Drew was indeed titian tressed.  Drew's been red before, but it tends to wash make her look Christina Ricci pale.  I'll have to wait until I can find a better picture for a true judgment, but the blurry one does show promise.   v Speaking of "Charlie's Angels", CAMERON DIAZ has snipped her shoulder-length tresses back to the choppy shag style she wore about a year ago.  This doesn't really warrant a full review because I already reported on what I thought about it the first time she did it.  Back then, I said that it wasn't terrible, but "that doesn't change the fact that she seems to be still in the process of going toward some style known only to her."  I still stand by that assessment, except that since she INTENTIONALLY cut it this way, I am retracting the "not terrible" part.

JENNA ELFMAN's hair update comes as close to warranting a full review without getting one as you can get.  Since starting the new TV season with a platinum, 70s-inspired, flippy, layered bob, she's moved back toward this decade with a smoother, less layered, shaggish bob.  Not only that, she's significantly toned own the color, even nearing her natural dark blonde color in many of the lowlights.  Personally, I like it, even though I'd like to see it styled a bit fuller.  I just hate to see her let her natural curls go waste (hey, there's a surprise, huh?)  v  Speaking of growth, JADA PINKETT SMITH has allowed her previous G.I. Jane-ish look to sprout.  She has been letting it grow for a while, but usually wore it braided or covered with a hat in public.  She finally revealed the new growth at the Grammies in a short (3-4 inches long), curly afro-ish style.  Looked adorable on her.  Hope to find a pic soon.

In an extrordinarily minor update, ILLEANA DOUGLAS of the now defunct FOX series "ACTION" has let the bob she wore on the show grow out to her shoulders.  Doesn't look bad at all, but then again it's not really that much different.  Actually, after reading this and looking at the picture, your first reaction was most likely, "Illeana who?" v  Speaking of unnoticed changes, CATHERINE ZETA JONES recently cut about 4-6 inches off of her luxuriant brunette locks and added some layering around the ends.  Odd thing is, you've probably seen her since she did it and didn't even notice.  I know that I didn't at first glance because it, and she, both still look fantastic.  Hopefully, though, this isn't the early symptoms of the dreaded "Must Cut My Hair Short Because I'm Having A Kid" Disease.

Also on the haircut front, JAMIE LEE CURTIS has taken her normally very short hair even shorter recently.  She now sports an ultra short, head-hugging, scalp-almost-showing pixie.  I like Jamie in short styles, since her fine hair and face shape lend themselves well this look, but not quite THIS short.  Maybe next time, she'll think twice before doing that Flowbee infomercial =) v KATE MOSS recently got a new shag cut.  The cut doesn't surprise me that much, since the length still falls 3 or 4 inches below her shoulders, but what does surprise me are the bangs.  Not that she got bangs, but that she had such a large, full section cut, since that's a rarity these days.  Personally, I don't find Kate's glazed, vacuous countenance appealing and it's not improved any by this cut.  The length is fine, but the bangs just remind you that she has a case of the Tori Spelling fish eyes v

Finally, as you are probably well aware, NAOMI CAMPBELL has also gotten shag.  Actually, Naomi had it cut a few months ago, but I didn't report on it because she so often wears wigs or hairpieces that I have to see her looking the same on four or five separate occasions before I'll acknowledge a true change.  Now that it's confirmed, I can say the style is quite flattering on her.  But, hey, she's a supermodel for Pete's sake.

 

Hunter Tylo pictures courtesy The Hunter Tylo Site, CBS Soaps In Depth, and ABC; Celine Dion pictures courtesy Reuters and France2; Calista Flockhart picture courtesy The Sta; Victoria Beckham, Jennifer Lopez, Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, Jenna Elfman, Catherine Zeta Jones, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Naomi Campbell pictures courtesy Reuters; Illeana Douglas picture courtesy Hollywood.Com

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